How (not) to Have a Clean House
Here is a foolproof recipe for a Very Unclean House:
- Have all children in the house get sick with the flu for a week.
- As soon as the fevers are gone, leave town for a week and
- leave behind the husband to do some home improvement projects.
- Return from trip with a basketful of dirty laundry.
- Right away, go have a good time with college friends you haven’t seen in years.
- As soon as the kids go to bed spend time talking to the husband without being constantly interrupted by little voices.
- Begin your homeschool year.
- Schedule your doctor’s visit and dentist’s visit in the same week.
- Have the kids begin a new instrument and double up on their swimming lessons.
- Make three batches of jam.
- Wash and iron the quilting fabric instead of the clothes.
- Go to every store within 10 miles that might have curtains for the bathroom and drag the kids with you.
- Go to Costco and buy a 10 pound bag of onions. Then leave them in a paper bag until they start melting.
- Allow the kids to play with some new toys on the living room floor.
- Take an afternoon nap every other day.
- Schedule meetings and activities for 3 out of 5 weeknights.
- Schedule at least one activity or appointment a day.
- Make a dinner that requires you to brown chicken and spatter grease everywhere.
- Spend hours wondering if your kids are going to turn out to be productive members of society or not (don’t judge me. you know you do it too).
- Write blog posts whenever the inspiration strikes, even if it is 4 o’clock in the morning!
Mix all these things together in the space of a few weeks and you’ll have a Really Unclean House too!
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go bake a cake (oh, did I mention I also agreed to make a cake to serve, like 40 people, for a church lunch?)